Drew Boswell

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The Power of Asking “Why”; Part Two

Dr. Daniel Povinelli, a behavioural scientist, in a documentary entitled Surviving Progress explains that up until recently the purpose of studying chimps was to look for similarities and show how they were similar to human beings. But his study has shown that the major difference between apes and humans is the human’s ability to ask “why.” Povinelli says, “Humans are probing for un-seen phenomenon to explain the observable.”

In a study with shapes where two identical shapes are given the test subject and they are asked to place them in a circle the same way; only one of the shapes is slightly askew on thScreen Shot 2015-08-08 at 11.51.08 AMe bottom and won’t stay upright. The chimp will try again and again to put the shape upright and will eventually give up.

Whereas the human will try several times but will eventually turn the shape over, examine the bottom, or shake it, asking, “why won’t the shape sit up like the other shape?” His conclusion is that this is a major difference between humans and chimps — humans ask “why?”

Screen Shot 2015-08-08 at 12.09.35 PM

In our organizations it is so easy to look around and figure out what is expected of us or our organization. You may have been “putting the shape in the circle” for a long time. But you know something isn’t right. A chimp would just keep doing the same thing — again, and again, and again. But has intelligent leaders we have to stop and examine why this isn’t working. Why does the shape keep falling over? Why does the staff not communicate? Why do we have such a high turnover rate? Why do some leaders feel they can’t trust other leaders in the organization? Why . . . (insert problem here)?

If it is a human tendency to ask “why,” then why do some leaders stop asking this fundamental question?

1. Not ready for the unpleasant answer or willing to deal with difficult or “sticky” situations.

Most of the time, once you start asking this question, there will be a very obvious reason — and that reason may be a person. People are complicated and filled with emotions. If something isn’t working properly it will also, without question, involve change. If you put these two primal elements together (people and change) what you get is explosive.

Unlike in fifth grade when your volcano science project exploded as planned, this reaction ends in hurt feelings, people leaving your organization, or the end of friendships. If we don’t ask “why,” then we don’t have to deal with the fallout. If we don’t ask “why” we become like our chimp friends trying to do the same thing again and again expecting to get different results (which I believe is Einsteins’s definition of insanity).

2. They are too busy asking the wrong question.

Hieronymus_Bosch_051A fundamental skill in magic is one’s ability to misdirect. The magician will do something (waving a hand, flashing a bright handkerchief, etc.) that will encourage you to look in one direction while he uses his other hand to do “magic.” While you are looking one way, he is doing something the other way. If our attention is in the wrong direction, and we are focused on the wrong things it is more than likely because we are asking the wrong questions.

If, for example, you are asking “how” before you are asking “why” you will more often than not feel overwhelmed in the enormity of what needs to get done. The reason and explanation (the why) drives our hearts to do whatever needs to be done (the how). If we are not focused on the end goal, the vision, and the rationale of our great attempts, then we become consumed with the drudgery of day-to-day details. Why always has to come before how. When you are evaluating your situation, write the questions of your heart down and see if they are in the proper order.

Squirrel.

3. They feel that the problem is not meant to be fixed.

m10qg-quotes-on-giving-upOk, so you tried a few times and you failed. You tried something and it was not supported, not funded, not liked . . .etc. Perhaps you are even now holding a scar from your service in the trenches. It is so easy for leaders to let problems go (especially if it’s not “that big a deal.”) You know that if that problem were fixed it would help the overall organization, but you have tried and it didn’t work the way you thought it would so you have essentially quit.

In your attitude, you are saying, “let someone else solve the problem.” If you are a leader then it’s your job. If you are in an organization that doesn’t want to listen to your ideas or value your inout then it is time to move on. Find a place where you can use your gift of asking “why,” and solving problems. Don’t allow your heart to simply accent to “this is how is has to be.” Keep pushing forward.

*This is part two of a two part series. Click here to read “The Power of Asking ‘Why’; Part One”

The Power of Asking “Why?”; Part One

Children are naturally inquisitive. When they reach the toddler years they begin to ask the question “why”? With four children I have answered thousands of their why questions.

Me, “time to take a bath.”

Child, “why”

Me, “because you have been outside playing and you are dirty.”

Child, “why did I get dirty?”

Me, “because you were digging in the dirt and you made mud pies.”

Child, “why, why, why, why, etc.

. . . because I said so, now get in the bathtub!

why question in metal typeOftentimes it is aggravating when my children ask why, because I suspect that they are using it as a stall tactic to keep from doing what I asked them to do. But, I suppose that many times there is genuine curiosity and desire to learn why the sky is blue, or why dogs have four legs, or why there aren’t any more dinosaurs, or why that man is homeless, or why we need to wear pants, etc.

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The question of why is asked many times in the Bible. God asks people why:

Genesis 4:6 “The Lord said to Cain, ‘Why are you angry, and why has your face fallen?’”

Matthew 6:28 “And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, . . .”

Genesis 18:13 “The Lord said to Abraham, “Why did Sarah laugh and say, ‘Shall I indeed bear a child, now that I am old?’”

People ask why from curiosity and wonder:

Exodus 3:3 “And Moses said, “I will turn aside to see this great sight, why the bush is not burned.”

People ask God why when they don’t understand the circumstances that they find themselves in:

Psalm 22:1 “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning?”

Job 3:11 “Why did I not die at birth, come out from the womb and expire?”

images3People ask the question of why for various reasons. Some are truly seeking answers to things that they do not understand. They want to help their organization grow and they as individuals want to grow.

Some simply say it as a way of expressing their opinions as being right. They are not seeking truth only seeking to prove their opinions to be correct. While an explanation being given they, instead of listening, are forming their next “why” question in their mind.

Some use the power of why to stir up trouble. They are not seeking solutions but seeking only to watch as their organization goes into a brawl. These are instigators and troublemakers. They really don’t care that an answer is reached, instead they are more interested in the chaotic process.

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So before you drop the W bomb, consider the following:

1) Asking why helps to separate tradition and history from doctrinal truth and vision. The two are not always self-contradictory, but many times can be. The leader has the charge of leading the organization into truth and the future while not allowing nostalgia and tradition to derail the vision.

2) Asking why can be a time of growth. Any organization that does not allow its’ members to ask the question is setting itself up for decline. The decline can be found in a member who is truly seeking honest answers as to why things are done a specific way and they are denied an opportunity of growth. The organization, if it allows others to ask why, opens itself up to evaluation. Organizations operate the way they do for a reason, good or bad. Asking why helps to confirm the rationale for its’ methods or exposes their weaknesses.

3) Asking why exposes the leader’s heart. There are many leaders who see those on their team as means to ends. They are not concerned about their personal growth; instead they are seen as a way to advance their agenda. If they ask why, it is seen as rebellion to the leader – these type of leaders want hear, “yes” not “why.” Any leader who sees it’s staff as disposable will leave destruction in their wake.

A good leader has a vision and plan and grows his people as he grows his organization. Loyalty and trust is earned by expressed concern and love. Staff need to know they are cared for and that their own growth as a person is important to the main leader. Everyone on the team needs to understand why we are doing this – even if the answer is obvious or simplistic.

4) Asking why may lead to an answer. Are you really ready for the answer? Before you ask why, you need to consider are you willing to change if the answer comes back as something you didn’t expect. Asking why is an indication of your desire to understand and grow – but don’t ask the question is you really don’t want to know the answer. Otherwise you are just stirring up trouble.

5) Asking why is powerful and evokes a powerful response. When you ask it, you should seek to confirm in others on the team that you are genuine in your desire to help improve the organization. Also, know that there may be strong emotional responses and be prepared to just step back or let things go until another day.

Asking why speaks to mimages1otive, the heart, or past situations that were “sticky.” So solutions or answers were reached and things were decided that worked for the day. Sometimes it’s better not to drudge all that up again. When you ask why, be ready for a strong answer.

If an answer is not known, then plan to be apart of finding the answer. If you are going to point out something that is wrong, then plan to be apart of the solution if you are able.

But don’t stop asking why. But prayerfully find the right time and check your heart to make sure you are asking for the right reasons.

 

 

"For by grace you have been saved through faith." Ephesians 2:8

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