“Samson’s First Marriage” Judges 14:1-20

The Story of Samson

A Sermon Series

“Samson’s First Marriage”

Judges 14:1-9

Introduction

Samson Lives by Instant Gratification (vv. 1-4)

Samson went down to Timnah, and at Timnah he saw one of the daughters of the Philistines. 2 Then he came up and told his father and mother, “I saw one of the daughters of the Philistines at Timnah. Now get her for me as my wife.” 3 But his father and mother said to him, “Is there not a woman among the daughters of your relatives, or among all our people, that you must go to take a wife from the uncircumcised Philistines?” But Samson said to his father, “Get her for me, for she is right in my eyes.” 4 His father and mother did not know that it was from the Lord, for he was seeking an opportunity against the Philistines. At that time the Philistines ruled over Israel.

The first word out Samson’s mouth after we are told that God was stirring his spirit (13:25) is woman. He has seen a woman, and in his own eyes, she seemed good. Samson is like all of the Israelite people where they are doing what seemed right in their own eyes.

“Normally in Israel parents decided whom their children should marry (Gen. 24:4, Exodus 21:9).”[1] His parents try to discourage him from choosing a wife from among the enemy of God’s people, “Is there not a woman among the daughters of your relatives, or among all our people, that you must go to take a wife from the uncircumcised Philistines?” – This is not a racially motivated remark (Israelite v. Philistine), instead the emphasis is on a covenant relationship with God, “a wife from the uncircumcised.”[2]

To be circumcised was a mark of a covenant relationship with God (Genesis 17). They are saying, “can’t you find a woman among the followers of the one true God that you could marry, instead of those that don’t follow God?” But it is also interesting what they don’t say,

• • “Intermarriage is forbidden by the Lord (Duet. 7:1-5).”
  • “The Lord has called you to be a Nazarite – you are called to deliver not marry.”

The parents are following the same line of thinking as the apostle Paul’s teaching in 2 Corinthians 6:14-15, “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? 15 What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever?”  

Why would it be wrong for Israelite men to marry Philistine women? Because God’s people had made a covenant with the one true God, and the Philistines worshipped other gods. Exodus 34:12 is a covenant renewal between God and his people, “Take care, lest you make a covenant (like a marriage covenant) with the inhabitants of the land to which you go, lest it become a snare in your midst. 13 You shall tear down their altars and break their pillars and cut down their Asherim 14 (for you shall worship no other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God), 15 lest you make a covenant with the inhabitants of the land, and when they whore after their gods and sacrifice to their gods and you are invited, you eat of his sacrifice, 16 and you take of their daughters for your sons, and their daughters whore after their gods and make your sons whore after their gods.” They are going to be loyal to their gods, and when you have children they will make them worship these false gods.

If your spouse doesn’t worship the same God, then he or she will constantly be pulling against your covenant with the Lord. “These types of relationships weaken a believer’s loyalty to God.”[3] You are in an intimate relationship with a person who does not share what is the very core of your being, your drive to do life, the compass that determines everything in your life – and they will constantly be pulling you to make God less in all parts of your life (which is idolatry). You will feel a constant pressure to worship something else, other than the one true God.

For Israel, remember that they are not crying out, even though they are oppressed by the Philistines. Why? With Samson we get a glimpse that shows how their cultures were deeply intertwined. There was little recognizable difference between the world and God’s people.

To become culturally indistinct is to be spiritually extinct.

Samson won’t listen, and he repeated that in his own eyes, he thinks this is the woman he wants to marry, “she is right in my eyes.” What we see about this young leader is that he is impulsive and ruled by his eyes. He is controlled by his senses, how he feels about something or someone leads him to act. He sees something or someone, he feels a certain way about that person or thing, and then he reacts – there is no considering, no pondering. He does not consider the consequences of his actions.

There is also another way to think about “she is right in my eyes.” Like when God says that something is right in His eyes, referring to a moral standard. So if Samson is saying, according to his “eyes” as in his moral standard she is the right one – then he has greatly gone away from God’s standards and will for His people.

At the beginning in the Garden of Eden God warned Adam and Eve not to eat of the tree of knowledge of Good and Evil. The serpent came along and tempted the couple to eat of the fruit, Genesis 3:6-7 “So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate. 7 Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked.” In Eve’s eyes (in her opinion) the fruit looked good, even though God had warned her not to eat of it. This is the original sin; we can choose (better than God) what is good and what is harmful.

(v. 2) “Now get her for me as my wife.” Samson’s parents are trying to give him godly advice, but instead he ignores them. He wants them to go now to get this woman for him as a wife. Samson is impulsive, lustful, and rejects the idea of delayed gratification.

(v. 4) “His father and mother did not know that it was from the Lord . . .” God was going to use Samson’s lack of impulse control, being controlled by his eyes, his lustful desire for women to carve out a divide between the Israelites and the Philistines. There was no outcry because God’s people were happy being culturally the same as the world – so God used their own sin to cause a divide, a slit between the peoples. “. . .left to himself, Samson would never have become involved in God’s or even Israel’s agenda; no left to themselves, the Israelites would have been satisfied to continue to coexist with the Philistines.”[4]

James 4:4 “You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.” Adultery is cheating on God by pursuing a relationship with the world, a friendship. You can’t be friends with both. God loves His people enough to cause a divide between those two things.

This does not imply that God is inciting Samson’s lustful desire for the woman: God uses his sinful actions to accomplish God’s will. God does not cause men to sin, but He can use their actions to accomplish his divine plan (ex. Jewish people executing Jesus which leads to the salvation of the world). “Left to himself, Samson would never have become involved in God’s or even Israel’s agenda. Left to themselves, the Israelites would have been satisfied to continue to coexist with the Philistines. But Yahweh has other plans.”[5]

Samson is Insensitive to God’s Plan (vv. 5-9)

5 Then Samson went down with his father and mother to Timnah, and they came to the vineyards of Timnah. And behold, a young lion came toward him roaring. 6 Then the Spirit of the Lord rushed upon him, and although he had nothing in his hand, he tore the lion in pieces as one tears a young goat. But he did not tell his father or his mother what he had done. 7 Then he went down and talked with the woman, and she was right in Samson’s eyes.

The first time we see Samson use his super human strength was in self-defense against a lion – but remember the big three of the Nazzarite vow 1) don’t drink anything from the vine, 2) don’t cut your hair, and 3) not to touch or go around anything dead.[6] So, his first action, after touching something dead should be to go to the temple to correct his being unclean.

Why didn’t he tell his parents? First, they would have given him a hard time about him being in a vineyard (as a Nazirite). And, secondly, because they would have insisted that he go to the temple, but Samson did not want to go to the temple. It would have involved an eight-day ritual that included shaving one’s head, offering a sin offering and a burnt offering, rededicating oneself for the period of the Nazirite vow, and offering a year-old male ram as a guilt offering (Numbers 6:9-12).”[7]

Instead, he wanted something else. “Then he went down and talked with the woman, and (we are reminded one more time,) she was right in Samson’s eyes. He wanted to pursue this woman, even at the expense of violating his vow.

Samson must choose to fulfil the requirements of the calling of God upon his life,

or gratify the desire that is “right in his eyes.”

8 After some days he returned to take her. And he turned aside to see the carcass of the lion, and behold, there was a swarm of bees in the body of the lion, and honey. 9 He scraped it out into his hands and went on, eating as he went. And he came to his father and mother and gave some to them, and they ate. But he did not tell them that he had scraped the honey from the carcass of the lion.

By not telling his father and his mother where the honey came from he made them unclean before the Lord (dishonoring them). So, not only does he not care about his relationship with God, but he also, is not concerned with other’s relationship with God. His being unclean, and his making his parents unclean is not of any concern to Samson. His only focus is satisfying what his eyes want. “His parents had sanctified him, but now he desecrates them.”[8]

Notice how Samson views this woman, “I saw one of the daughters of the Philistines at Timnah. Now get her for me as my wife.” His desire to marry her is completely based on her appearance, and then later he talks with her, “Then he went down and talked with the woman, and she was right in Samson’s eyes.” Then after he has talked with her there is no thinking about how she followed a god that was the enemy of his people’s God.

It’s all about looks and how she makes him feel. And then it says, “After some days he returned to take her.” “ I want her to be mine.” If you live by Samson’s moral standard, what happens when the woman’s beauty fades, or they actually have a real discussion about the purpose of life, and the lust fades?

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[1] Herbert Wolf, The Expositor’s Bible Commentary, Volume 3 (Grand Rapids, Michigan; Zondervan publishing, 1992) 466.

[2] “Moses marries a non-Israelite, Zipporah, but she recognized God’s covenant; see Exodus 4:24-26.” Tim Keller, Judges For You (USA; The Good Book Company, 2013) 136.

[3]

[4] Daniel I. Block, The New American Commentary, Judges, Ruth (Nashville, Tennessee; Broadman & Holman, 1999) 424.

[5] K. Lawson Younger Jr., The NIV Application Commentary, Judges, Ruth (USA; Zondervan Academic, 2002) 379.

[6] Numbers 6:1-8

[7] Younger, 380.

[8] W. Gary Phillips, Holman Old Testament Commentary, Judges, Ruth (Nashville, Tennessee; Holman Reference, 2004) 222.

[9] Phillips, 223.

[10] J Harris, C. Brown, & M. Moore, New International Biblical Commentary, Joshua, Judges, Ruth (Peabody, Massachusetts; Hendrickson Publishing, 2000) 245.

[11] Block, 438.