Drew Boswell

a place for us to share ideas, talk about life, and learn together.

Restored Relationship at Camp Rock

Camp Tygert Dining Hall “decked out” for Christmas

Camp Rock is a camp specifically designed to serve children who are in the foster care system or are “at risk.” The Valdosta Baptist Association sponsors this event, and Redland Baptist Church specifically organizes the camp. This year there were over a hundred children who enjoyed a five day, four night camp complete with three meals, housing, and a great staff of counselors.

The highlight of the week is Christmas at Camp Rock where the entire dinning hall is decorated for Christmas Thursday after lunch so that when the kids enter for dinner they are completely surprised by Christmas decorations, lights, singing of carols, gifts, a hug from the entire staff, and a huge Christmas dinner. There were many open mouths and smiles as the children entered the dining hall.

My family had the privilege of serving as support staff for the entire week. We emptied trash, cooked, took pictures, videos, helped wherever we could, and the Amazing Bozini even made a guest appearance. My children were in with other kids who floated through the programming and even slept in the cabins at night

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Words Hurt.

On one of the days as the kids were floating from station to station, I was returning something to the adults cabin and came across Caleb’s (my son’s) camp counselor (who also happened to be named Caleb). The counselor told me of how Caleb and another boy had just had a “disagreement” and that the other boy named Brandon wanted to go home, as a result of their argument. Caleb (the counselor) was at a loss of what to do and basically handed it over to me, and he and the group went on their way from kickball to their next station. So there I was with Brandon who was crying uncontrollably and Caleb who seemed to be nonchalant about the whole event.

I asked Caleb what had happened and he began to tell me a story of how he and Brandon had been discussing Pokemon characters and which one of them were more powerful than another. Caleb said one character was more powerful because of one thing, and Brandon had countered with some other reasons why another character was more powerful. The disagreement continued to escalate and become heated until Brandon said, “well at least I don’t have to wear idiot glasses.” And after some discussion with Brandon I further discovered that Caleb had fired back with, “well at least I have a thumb!” Brandon’s comment did hurt Caleb’s feelings, but Caleb’s words cut deep.

You see Brandon was born without a thumb. Every day of Brandon’s life (as he explains it) he is made fun of for not having a thumb. His school life is miserable because there are bullies there that ridicule him about the deformity. Caleb’s words had hit him deep and in a way that he never could have predicted. Brandon came to “Bible Camp” hoping to have one week of his life where no one would make fun of him because of his thumb.

One minute Brandon was firing back, and the next he was an emotional crying lump on the floor. Caleb had won the verbal scrimmage, but the cost of the victory was very high. I made the boys apologize to each other and go on to their next station (this worked for my boys when they argue, why not try it here?). Caleb didn’t mean it, and Brandon would have nothing to do with it.

I took Brandon to crafts (their next station) and got him started in the craft project where he eventually calmed down. I then proceeded and take Caleb outside to “explain” how powerful his words had been over Brandon. I leaned in pretty hard, and was very descriptive of how this boy’s life was affected by people’s words and how his life was different because of his deformity. I described how this camp was designed to be a haven for these children whose lives are so full of pain and disappointment and now he had messed that up for this boy. Did I say that leaned in pretty hard?

Words are powerful.

I told him that he had to make this right and how the boy wanted to go home, leave camp, because of the pain that he felt because of Caleb’s words. Then Caleb began to cry. After a few minutes I told him to go to the bathroom, clean up his face, and at some point when he felt best (I left it up to him) he was to go and apologize to Brandon where he was to truly express how he felt sorry for his actions, and explain that to him. He wanted go right away, but I told him to wait and let Brandon cool down and talk to him later. Caleb then went back to another table and started his craft project.

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Making It Right

I then went to a corner in the craft room to begin working on a video for a presentation on the last day. As I was editing video and pictures on my laptop, I looked up to see Caleb standing at Brandon’s seat. I could not hear what he said, but I could see on his face that he truly was sorry for what he had said. The boys hugged and I could not hold back my tears. I gave him a smile, and as they hugged he smiled back over Brandon’s shoulder. They were inseparable the rest of the week. They even set up a play date for later in the summer.

Brandon and Caleb

My son had fallen, and then made it right. I was so glad that I was there to guide the process, and witness my son doing the right thing. I am so glad that my son’s conscience was stricken with guilt over his behavior. As we stood outside the classroom, it felt like I was giving him a verbal spanking. It was different than lectures about how he needed to work harder in school, or not to aggravate his siblings. He needed to get to a point where he got a glimpse of how his words had hurt another person.

Our children will make mistakes and have moral failings, and I was so thankful to God that I was able to be there to steer him in the right direction. A parent’s words are powerful. If we use them for evil we can crush our children. If we use them for good, then we can steer them toward righteousness and away from destruction.

“Hear, my son, your father’s instruction,

and forsake not your mother’s teaching,

for they are a graceful garland

for your head and pendants for your neck.”

Proverbs 1:8-9

People Watching

“Going to Town”

As a young boy I have fond memories of spending many Friday nights with my grandparents. They had a tradition that stretched out over several decades of leaving their quaint farm home and driving “to town.” Their destination was the Opelika Mall near Auburn, Alabama (where I would eventually go to college, but I don’t think this family tradition impacted that decision in any way). My grandmother, who I affectionately call Mamama (yes, there is a story behind this nickname), would stroll through JC Penny, Sears, and the like until she had purchased the perfect Christmas, birthday, etc. present. This process of elimination would take several hours.

While she would shop my grandfather would sit on a bench in the middle of the mall. He would be joined there by other men (not always elderly, I am a case in point) who would carry out a manly tradition that in our background check, National Security, 9-11, restraining order, day may sound a little shocking. But these men would (and I suppose this tradition still is alive today) “people watch.”

This involves observing people as they walk through, hang out, run errands, and shop in the mall or other public place. All kinds of people doing all kinds of things seemed to fascinate the retired gas company worker, dairy farm owner, and WWII veteran.  Occasionally one of these men would lean over to the other men there, make a comment, and the whole group would laugh. These men didn’t know each other and rarely even talked to each other, other than these cryptic softly spoken comments. They did not make comments about women, but teens with multicolored spiked hair, or an untethered wild child would almost always get some kind of a reaction from my grandfather. The “weirdo” who spoke to himself, did things that everyone else does in private in public, or was “just not right in the head” typically did not get laughs but frowns and looks of concern.

As a boy observing this behavior and even sitting down and doing it myself has taught me something very important:

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People Watching 

1.  Observation is an art form. You don’t stare at people. You look in their general direction as if looking at something behind them, but while they aren’t looking you take in all the details of the person. But if you look close enough for long enough the details of their lives pop out like some dialogue in a Sherlock Holmes novel. Some are better observers than others. But everyone has something to tell just in how they walk through the mall.

2.  People watchers enjoy variety. If everyone were like them, these elderly men would have nothing to make comments about. The variety in life made their lives fun for a couple of hours on a Friday evening.

3.  Storytelling. As I watched the people I would create a story for them in my mind. If it were a dating couple (and yes you can tell the difference between dating a married couples) I could look at the girl and then the boy and be able to tell you everything about their relationship. If it were a mother and child I would imagine what kind of house they lived in, what they ate, the car they drove, even what Christmas would have been like in their home – from just a few seconds of watching them together.

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Eventually, one by one the grey hairs would come to collect their husbands and the panel of antique observers would shrink down to the last one. My grandmother would say, “Fletcher, are you ready?” and my grandfather would slowly stand and without a word walk back to the car and drive home. He would have a smile on his face as he remembered a comment made by the men, or a wildly dressed young person. In a week’s time the tradition would continue once more.

Big A Club 2012

Marolyn Bearden and a child at Big A Club

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you volunteers and LODAC administrators that made this opportunity possible.

An Exit Strategy

4th Grade Boys during the "Great Barrier Reef" Crafts

Many churches are right in the middle of the Vacation Bible School season. This is the time of year where you may see a sighting of otherwise reserved adults dancing crazy, children making elaborate crafts, or even adults of all ages having fun with children as they learn stories from the Bible. This year we at FBCV asked our Sunday School classes (for the first time ever) to decorate one of twelve different areas that we wanted to have decorated for VBS.

They did a magnificent job, put in many hours making it special, and most paid for the decorations themselves. We had the kids vote on the best area (our reward will be given out this coming Sunday).  Many older adults who typically did not participate in VBS, now were able to feel as though they were apart of the outreach effort (and they truly were.) Many wanted to know what the children thought of the huge hanger in the sanctuary, the smoking volcano in the fellowship hall (complete with orange glowing light), or the beautifully painted mountains in the children’s building, etc. . .

Many weeks went into planning the big event, and thousands of dollars were spent making this a very special week. We had many kids who heard about the love of Christ, and we have a list of families to follow up with over the next few weeks.

With all the planning that went into getting ready for the event, and the effort spent during the event, at 12:30 on Thursday (the last day of VBS) I realized that I had forgotten one very important item that should have been on my “to do” list.

1. Have an “Exit Strategy.”

The old saying, “What goes up, must come down” is very true, especially if it is made of crepe paper, paper plates, and hot glued to the wall. While the church tolerated a massive hanger in the sanctuary, and may have even found it humorous, if it were to stay there very long it would have caused agitation.

The waterfalls in the Sunday School rooms were nice for the children but took up valuable sitting space in already crowded classrooms. So, without any real discussion, the decorations had to come down before Sunday. But by 12:30 the staff of over fifty were down to two, and I realized I had failed to establish a clean up plan. So all day Friday and most of Saturday were spent cleaning it all up.

Many times leaders spend all their time planning the front end of the event, but rarely think it all the way through until the last bag of trash is thrown into the dumpster, and the last chair is put back in place.

2. What you fail to plan, you get to do.

One of a leader’s main tasks it to think. They need to have the ability to sit down and be able to “connect the dots” from one step to another, until all the steps complete a picture of a successful project.  Experience allows one to be able to see more details. But, if you fail to spend enough time thinking through the details, then when you realize your mistake (and usually its right in the middle of “craziness” or in my case when everyone had gone home), you are the one who has to do these tasks.  Midnight runs to Wal-Mart for cool-aid, stressful conversations with parents who want their children but you can’t find them on your campus, or all day Saturday clean ups are simply no fun at all (especially if you are by yourself).  All of these examples could have been prevented if a little better planning had gone into the event.

Bags of Food Collected for "Hungry at Home" Backpack Ministry

Some times leaders know these tasks need to be completed and just don’t want to ask someone else to do it. They may feel that others have done so much already and to ask them to do one more thing would be too much. But we have to remember that the church functions as a unit, and shares the load of ministry together. Typically leaders may say something like, “can you help me out by . . . “

But this is really backwards thinking. The project is a church wide push to reach children and families for Christ. It’s not one man’s (or woman’s) personal crusade that they are need to recruit people to help them do. It is an effort that the entire church should do because we all understand the mission and what we are all trying to accomplish for Christ. The Chinese proverb is so true, “many hands makes light work.” When we don’t ask others to do things we rob them of the opportunity to serve Christ and their church, and we get very tired.  Most people are ready to work but just don’t know what needs to be done. Next year, I plan to ask the Sunday School classes to decorate an area, and at the end to carefully take it down as well.

 

The Leader as the Intent Keeper; Matthew 6:1-4

“Tooting Your Own Horn (or trumpet)”

Matthew 6:1-4 “Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven. 2 “Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. 3 But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, 4 so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.”

In this passage from Matthew 6 Jesus continues the Sermon on the Mount. He has already covered material in the Beatitudes, being salt and light, His fulfilling of the Law, anger, lust, divorce, oaths, retaliation, and loving one’s enemies. Now he moves to a discussion of service.

This passage was written to individuals who in their pride want others to notice their practices, and to make people aware of how God desires to reward His children for their behavior. Is it wrong for churches to ‘announce’ that they are doing certain “practices of righteousness?” We have web sites, facebook, signs on our campuses, newsletters, (etc.) that tell of our ministries and how we seek to serve the community – is it wrong to ‘announce’ these things?

If we use Matthew 6 as a guiding precept, then the main indicator of transgression is one’s motive. Should the church be driven by the desire to be “rewarded” by God? The word ‘reward’ is used three times in verses one through four and the potential of losing it is based on pride in the individual as they do a particular act of righteousness. It is assumed by the text that God’s reward is something to be sought after.

Motive seems to the determination of reward, but practicing righteousness before other people seems to be unavoidable in many situations. But it is the extra step of drawing attention (blowing a trumpet) to one’s actions for the purpose of being noticed and praised by others that crosses the line.

If you (or a church) do an action to be seen by other people then you lose your reward that would have come from God. If you do an action to be seen by God then there is a reward from God given to you.

The remedy to prideful acts is to “give to the needy” in secret, and don’t let other people know about your giving. The Father sees all things done in secret. Would you give to someone if no one would ever know? How you answer this question helps you determine your motive.

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Guarding Intent

In the Christian life what we do boils down to motive (Why we do what we do). There are many motives (an unhealthy fear of God, pride in having others “see” them, guilt for past actions, self-righteousness and how the service makes you feel, etc.) that are invalid for the Christian to do what they do.

It is easy for a noble endeavor to lose its original intent and degrade into something far less noble. For example, a church starts a Christian school. It’s original purpose and intent was to start a school to change the culture of young people and to give them a Christian worldview.

But as time passed the motive moves toward a desire to generate more than needed revenue. So certain standards are lessened until eventually the original noble objective is lost. The school becomes too focused on attracting more and more students, and in order to do this it lowers its threshold of who can attend and what they do as part of the “Christian” curriculum. The declining school was not actually declining in numbers, but in its impact among the children. While it focused on bigger, newer, and being flashy it became more about being better than the Christian school across the county rather than changing children’s lives. What a tragedy. They had gained the world (and the bragging rights) but had lost the children’s souls.

All Christians and Churches will face moments of when their motives will be tested, and we may need to be brought back from a false trajectory. 1 Peter 1:6-7 “In this [one’s salvation] you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”

The trigger for this decline is sin and you can insert a host of different sins; fear, pride, worldliness, a lack of faith . . . and this sin inevitably leads to a loss of purpose.

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The Leader as the Intent Keeper

1. The leader must guard the purpose. When he fails in this task the organization drifts toward decline.

2. The leader must remind the people of the purpose. If we forget why we are doing something, then it becomes much easier to focus our time and precious resources on anything else (other than what’s truly the most important thing). It is mission critical that the leader pound the drum of purpose. Why does the organization exist? Now say it again, and again, and again (ad nauseum).

3. The leader says ‘No” a lot. People will constantly bring ideas of things that could be done by the organization, but the leader has to say no to things that don’t directly line up to the purpose and no to ideas that would take valuable resources away from its ultimate objective.

Whenever there is confusion regarding what the organization is to be about, then there will inevitably be a power clash. The leader must nip any conflicting visions in the bud before they had time to work throughout the organization.

4. The leader has to be a hunter of sacred cows. Once the purpose has been determined, announced, explained then there will begin to develop a distinction between activities that line up with the mission and activities that don’t. These distinct activities that don’t may have been around for a long time, but actually work against the health of the overall organization.

The leader with wisdom, tact, and much prayer must kill the sacred cow. These bovine activities distract and take needed resources and personnel from the ultimate objective. There are not many things harder for a leader to do than to kill something many hold to be “sacred” and a part of their tradition.

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In life it is far easier to decline than to develop. It is easier to tear down than to build. It is easier to maintain than to push the organization forward. Guarding your own motive for Christian service is a hard task, and requires effort. Take time today to evaluate your heart and press on to do great things for the Lord. Just leave the trumpet at home.

"For by grace you have been saved through faith." Ephesians 2:8

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