mistakes

A Season for Everything — Dealing with 2020

***There is a sermon link at the bottom of this page from a sermon I preached on Ecclesiastes 3, a few years ago.

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Life is constantly moving from one thing to another and we are in constant transition. When you are born your body radically changes daily. From there it’s walking, potty training, eating by yourself, then eventually reading, writing, driving, Calculus, girlfriends, college, marriage, kids, mini-vans, thinning hair, kids start dating, kids leave for college, etc. At every stage, just when you have it figured out, guess what? It’s time to change to something else. If 2020 has taught us anything, it is that life is going to change, and rarely does it go back to being “normal.”

The following are a few mistakes that we can make in dealing with transitions.

Mistakes of dealing with transitions of life:

Moving Forward Too Fast

This is when we are looking toward the next transition too soon.When I was in seminary there were those that would max out the amount of classes they could take. They rarely (if ever) left their rooms except to go to class. If you did happen to see these recluses, and were able to squeeze in a conversation, they constantly talked about how they wanted to finish school as soon as possible (yeah, no kidding).

They were missing “the seminary experience” in order to get to the “real world” of ministry. The whole purpose of seminary was to equip them for the ministry they desired to do, but in their rushing through the experience they were short circuiting the process of being equipped in order to move to the next stage. They were checking the boxes as fast as they could.

At every stage of life and in every time of transition there are things we are to learn, life lessons to experience, and people that we are to meet and engage in life with. If you move from stage to stage, and transition to transition, with never stopping to engage in the moment, then you are going to miss something very important in your life. But seriously, “When have you finally arrived?” At what point of success will you slow down and concentrate on the moment?

Holding On For Too Long

The second mistake is the opposite of the first. This is when we try to hold on to the past so long that it keeps us from moving with the flow of the present. It’s like we are anchored to the past, and the swirl of the current of life roars past us. If Stacy London and Clinton Kelly have taught me anything, it is that people get trapped in a time of their lives then they were happy or at least felt safe. But when they aren’t able to move forward in life (like when someone dies, a divorce, or some other tragic event) their fashion/dress gets stuck and they don’t move on. This is a visual picture of what happens when we don’t roll with the transitions, but emotionally (which we can’t see) it make take the form of shutting down, not trying, or just trying to disappear from society. Life becomes this dance of grabbing on the present, while letting go of the past – moment to moment.

People Are Important

Another mistake people make in dealing with transitions is Not Developing Relationships As You Go. Life (and ministry) is all about relationships, people, and how we are all connected together. It took me until my adult life to realize that the people who have been in my life weren’t just there (as trees in a landscape), they were there for me to develop meaningful relationships with.

In our self-centered lives we tend to view people as ways to get us to where we want to go; they become tools we use to help us advance in our goals, visions, or careers. If they can’t be of help to us, we tend to marginalize them out of our lives. This is a huge mistake because even if you perceive that a person will be in your life for a short period of time, you still should make an effort to get to know them, love them, befriend them, and invest your life in theirs. Who knows where it might lead and what the future holds? But also, what if we are in one season of life much longer than we had anticipated?

Not Enjoying the Moment

There are moments in my kid’s lives that I will always treasure. I have loved leading Joshua and Caleb in Scouts, having lunch with Isaac and picking him up from school, or doing Hannah-Grace’s hair for a dance recital when her mother had to go out of town.

It sounds cliche, but “stop to smell the roses.” Our kids are only in their transition for a moment and then they move on to something else. Each day is a gift, and each new change is an opportunity to keep a great relationship, start over, or make things right.

Transitions cause stress in our lives. We feel the need to make decisions, and our focus can become completely consumed by this need to take some action, make a final decision, or the feeling to just do something. During these times of transitions (especially during moments like today) we are not sure of what we need to do. In that time of stress, life still moves on, it doesn’t stop because we are not sure what we should be doing.

Ministry involves emotional work. Like nurses or police officers, pastors regularly engage in activities as a part of their day-to-day responsibilities where they must deal with other people’s problems, emotions, and behavior. They are expected to express love, compassion, emotion, or they are expected to reserve that emotion, to be professionally distant and to control it all like a switch.

So as the years go by, if we are not careful, our emotion switch gets stuck or even broken. Numbness and callousness sets in like a whiteout in the winter. We stop feeling, caring, and everything goes on autopilot. We are so “professional” that we can fool everyone, even ourselves.

But if we are numb on the inside, then we miss those moments of transitions that our kid’s need for us to be completely present. If you are at this point, and you are not able to enjoy the moment then stop what you are doing, take a break, pray, and focus on doing whatever it takes to regain your sense of feeling. One of the ways that I have found to manage that professional numbness is to focus on today (you can’t control tomorrow). I don’t know what God has in store for me in the future, but today I have responsibilities, children who need a dad, a wife that needs a husband, etc. If I can focus on that, and only that, then I can fend off the feeling of paralysis by analysis.

All of these things deal with finding the right balance between moving and staying still, holding on and letting go, building up and moving on (Ecclesiastes 3 puts it much better; see below). I would also recommend “Didn’t See It Coming,” by Carey Nieuwhof. While it doesn’t completely offer steps to solve this issue, it does give you a point of reference on the topic (in other words it is a helpful place to begin the discussion with yourself and others).

I have found that it has been my relationship with Jesus that allowed me to find that place between true joy through living out one’s purpose without slipping into numb professionalism and feeling overwhelmed by the magnitude of life.

Here is a sermon on Ecclesiastes 3 that I preached at Daybreak Community Church, many a moon ago. It also deals with the issue of change and how life stinks sometimes.

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Ecclesiastes 3 “A Time for Everything” (ESV)

For everything there is a season, and ^la time for every matter under heaven:

² a time to be born, and a time to ^mdie;

a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;

³ a time to kill, and a time to heal;

a time to break down, and a time to build up;

⁴ a time to ⁿweep, and a time to laugh;

a time to mourn, and a time to ^odance;

⁵ a time to ^pcast away stones, and a time to ^qgather stones together;

a time to embrace, and a time to ^rrefrain from embracing;

⁶ a time to seek, and a time to ^slose;

a time to keep, and a time to ^tcast away;

⁷ a time to ^utear, and a time to sew;

a time to ^vkeep silence, and a time to speak;

⁸ a time to love, and a time to ^whate;

a time for war, and a time for peace.

Vision: You’re Doing It Wrong. Three Common Mistakes Leaders Make Relating to Vision

Churches and businesses are drawing close to the time when they will begin to gather and open in groups once again. Pastors, staffs, and business owners are going to make decisions regarding reopening their doors and gather in groups. While they have gained new ways of doing things (Zoom meetings, social distancing, sanitizing, etc.) its’ natural tendency is to go back to “normal” — but they are in a day that their “old normal” just can not continue. Churches and businesses have to change, but it is the vision of the organization that will allow it move through these unknown and treacherous times.

Focusing on the issues and changes that need to be made will keep you away from the vision if you allow it, but one would do it to their own peril. The following are three things that many leaders get wrong — it is the vision that will allow them to navigate through these tough decisions.

1. Mistake#1 – Vision is Not About Fixing Problems.

Vision is not seeing perceived problems that need to be fixed and then designing a plan to fix those problems. Fixing problems is on the job description for a leader, but it is not vision. A skillful leader can fix problems all the day long but never show vision.

The leader who falls into this category is stuck in maintenance mode. Nehemiah did not fix the walls because they were broken. The broken walls changed how God’s people were living, so the walls had to be built so that people’s lives would be changed. When we are only about fixing problems we have actually lost sight of the vision. Casting vision and pushing it through the organization will cause all kinds of issues, it actually creates problems.

A good vision will allow people to clearly see where the organization is going, there will be people who don’t want to go on this trip, and others will want to get on the bus with you. But don’t expect it to be clean and neat, and that everyone will be happy.

2. Mistake #2 – Vision is Not a Group Project.

A vision can be shared, but it cannot be developed by the organization, it has to come from the leader. Visions spread and are adapted as they grow throughout an organization. They begin to take a life of their own in different ways, but it is a guiding force from the top of the organization.

The top leader has to constantly push the vision because it will get lost among the masses. The organization as a whole cannot push the vision forward without the main leader encouraging them to do so. God does not give multiple visions to multiple people, He gives one vision to the main leader. If He did there would be chaos.

This is not to say that counsel should not be sought after before developing a vision or even letting key leaders have input into the process. Proverbs 15:22 says, “Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.” But once they have been heard and their advice taken into account, it is the main leader who sets the vision.

3. Mistake #3 – Vision Is Not ALL About Making Changes.

Beginning something new, ending something that is not working, or making changes, is not vision. Changes are tools that allow you reach or achieve the vision. You can change how you are structured, hire or fire employees, etc. but these are changes that make organizations healthy and stable. Once the organization is stable, healthy, etc. you still have to ask and answer the question “Why are we doing this?” and you have to have an answer (and ask it again, and again, and again, ad nauseam).

Can God Use A Flawed Leader? 1 Kings 3:1-15

Caleb and Joshua’s birthday is coming up, and when they were younger every time we would go to the grocery store, Wal-mart, Burger King, or when they would see a commercial on TV; they would say almost constantly, “Dad, I want that for my birthday,” “I want that, I want that, dad I want that” and I may say, “Caleb do you really want a Shrek foam lamp?” or “Joshua do you really want that movie, it will give you nightmares?”

Many of our prayers are like that, “ Lord, I want this, and this, and that, and can you do this, and that” . . .on and on we go, while God is sitting there saying, “Are you sure you want to have that, or do this, or go there?” “I have such a bigger vision for your life than a Shrek foam lamp, I want to pour out my goodness on your life and give you this.” As you consider your walk with the Lord and the things you ask of Him, consider the following from 1 Kings 3. He desires to use flawed people to accomplish unimaginable things. He desires to use you to do the wonderful. But there is a process.

What Kind of Leader Would Solomon Be? (vv. 1-4)

^“1 Solomon made an alliance with Pharaoh king of Egypt and married his daughter. He brought her to the City of David until he finished building his palace and the temple of the LORD, and the wall around Jerusalem. ² The people, however, were still sacrificing at the high places, because a temple had not yet been built for the Name of the LORD. ³Solomon showed his love for the LORD by walking according to the statutes of his father David, except that he offered sacrifices and burned incense on the high places. ⁴ The king went to Gibeon to offer sacrifices, for that was the most important high place, and Solomon offered a thousand burnt offerings on that altar.”

The book of I Kings opens with David making Solomon king, David giving his son some instructions and making a few requests of his son, and Solomon then doing some housekeeping. And in today’s text we get a first glimpse of what kind of king Solomon was to be.

An Alliance with Egypt

When God was giving the people the law, he warned that the people would one day want a king, and he warned the people not to let him do certain things. Deuteronomy 17:16 “The king, moreover, must not acquire great numbers of horses for himself or make the people return to Egypt to get more of them, for the LORD has told you, “You are not to go back that way again.” To go back to Egypt was to return to a place of slavery. But here we see that Solomon sees the need to marry the daughter of Egypt.

2 Chronicles 1:14-16 “Solomon accumulated chariots and horses; he had fourteen hundred chariots and twelve thousand horses, which he kept in the chariot cities and also with him in Jerusalem. ¹⁵ The king made silver and gold as common in Jerusalem as stones, and cedar as plentiful as sycamore-fig trees in the foothills. ¹⁶ Solomon’s horses were imported from Egypt and from Kue’ the royal merchants purchased them from Kue.”

Married to Foreign (Women)

1 Kings 11:1-2 “King Solomon, however, loved many foreign women besides Pharaoh’s daughter, Moabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Sidonians and Hittites. ² They were from nations about which the LORD had told the Israelites, “You must not intermarry with them, because they will surely turn your hearts after their gods.” Nevertheless, Solomon held fast to them in love.”

Solomon marries these women from foreign lands. Just as an aside, this is not a racial issue — it has to do with the false gods these women worshiped.

Performing Burnt Offerings to Foreign gods

God wanted the people to worship and sacrifice on the altar of the tabernacle, in the manner He commanded Moses, but even more so, He wanted their obedience. Every time we see sacrifices mentioned in the Bible, we need to remember that this is part of God’s concession, and not His will, as we are told in 1 Samuel 15:22 “Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the LORD ? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams.”

Duet. 12:1-2, 4 “These are the decrees and laws you must be careful to follow in the land that the LORD, the God of your fathers, has given you to possess, as long as you live in the land. ² Destroy completely all the places on the high mountains and on the hills and under every spreading tree where the nations you are dispossessing worship their gods. . . ⁴ You must not worship the LORD your God in their way.

But Solomon once again ignores God’s Word, “. . . . except that he offered sacrifices and burned incense on the high places”

The Presence of “High Places”

“The king [Solomon] went to Gibeon to offer sacrifices.” We first see the city of Gideon in the Bible when they fool Joshua in Joshua 9:14 “The men examined some of their [Gibeonites] provisions, but they failed to ask the Lord’s advice.” God’s command to Joshua and the rest of the people was to clear out the promised land of foreign people who worshipped foreign gods. This group of people was allowed to stay, and now the king of God’s chosen people is there worshipping their gods.

Here are four examples where the leader ignores God’s Word and decides to do what “seems right in his own eyes.” But, how do we explain that God is about to appear before Solomon, he is going to bless him in ways that no other man has ever known, and yet we see him here, he is clearly going against God and His ways? The first time we really see Solomon acting as king, he is messing up big time.

Do you ever feel that way as a leader? You may not see at the time, but if you look back over your life you see mess ups, mistakes, bad calls, and just plain sinfulness. Can God use you? Is it possible to overcome these things?

Read on friend.

The King Makes a Wish (vv. 5-9)

⁵ At Gibeon the LORD appeared to Solomon during the night in a dream, and God said, “Ask for whatever you want me to give you.” ⁶ Solomon answered, “You have shown great kindness to your servant, my father David, because he was faithful to you and righteous and upright in heart. You have continued this great kindness to him and have given him a son to sit on his throne this very day. ⁷ “Now, O LORD my God, you have made your servant king in place of my father David. But I am only a little child and do not know how to carry out my duties. ⁸ Your servant is here among the people you have chosen, a great people, too numerous to count or number. ⁹ So give your servant a discerning heart to govern your people and to distinguish between right and wrong. For who is able to govern this great people of yours?”

“The king went to Gibeon to offer sacrifices” While Solomon was on the high place, going against what God’s Word and Commandments clearly teach, sacrificing animals to other gods, “At Gibeon the LORD appeared to Solomon.”

Romans 10:20 “And Isaiah boldly says, “I was found by those who did not seek me; I revealed myself to those who did not ask for me.”

God in His grace and mercy came to Solomon, when Solomon would not come to the Lord in His Temple. And even though Solomon had sinned against Him, the Lord said, “I want to bless your life greatly!” he said, “Sinner, I want to use you, I want to bless you, I want to use you greatly!

This is one reason why I love the Bible, God loves to reach down and take sinful people and bless them and that’s what happened to the Apostle Paul in Acts 9:1-4 “Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples. He went to the high priest ²and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus, so that if he found any there who belonged to the Way, whether men or women, he might take them as prisoners to Jerusalem. ³As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. ⁴He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?”

Abraham, who was worshipping other gods is called, Joshua 24:2 “Joshua said to all the people, “This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: ‘Long ago your forefathers, including Terah the father of Abraham and Nahor, lived beyond the River and worshiped other gods.”

God’s words didn’t come through a prophet, or a seer, God appeared to him in person. And He simply said to Solomon, “ask for whatever you want me to give to you.” Have you ever heard the teaching on prayer, that says, God answers prayer with yes, no, or wait? Many times God desires to bless us, or use us in a powerful way, but we have to grow into it, or be able to handle it. God desires for us to learn things about ourselves and what He desires to do through us.

What if God were to come to you, and say, “ask for whatever you want me to give to you.” Jesus put it this way, Mark 11:22 “Have faith in God,” Jesus answered. ²³“I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him. ²⁴Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.“

In this process of talking with God Solomon recognizes four things about himself:

(1) “You have shown great kindness to your servant, my father David, because he was faithful to you . . . a son to sit on his throne this very day” — Solomon recognizes that he is in a position that he did not earn, deserve, “ it was because of someone else’s righteousness, his father David, that he is able to be where he is. When we spend time with God we quickly encounter His greatness and our humanity.

(2) “Now, O LORD my God, you have made your servant king,” He recognizes that he was king, whether he deserved to be there or not, whether someone else could do a better job, no matter what his view of himself was, he was there, on the thrown and he was king. If you find yourself to be the leader then God expects you to lead.

(3) “But I am only a little child and do not know how to carry out my duties.” He recognizes that in his responsibilities, he does not know how to do it well. He feels like a child, inadequate, and fumbling. In most things that relate to leadership, people, and the spiritual, we humans are this way. Those that think they “have arrived” or are “experts” will eventually discover that it is by God’s grace that they have had success.

(4) “⁸Your servant is here among the people you have chosen, a great people, too numerous to count or number.” Solomon recognizes that the task before him is a great one. He feels overwhelmed and doesn’t know what to do. God’s vision for you is great, do you see it? It is larger than what you can do on your own.

The Wonder of God’s Grace (vv. 10-13)

¹⁰ The Lord was pleased that Solomon had asked for this. ¹¹ So God said to him, “Since you have asked for this and not for long life or wealth for yourself, nor have asked for the death of your enemies but for discernment in administering justice, ¹² I will do what you have asked. I will give you a wise and discerning heart, so that there will never have been anyone like you, nor will there ever be. ¹³ Moreover, I will give you what you have not asked for, both riches and honor” so that in your lifetime you will have no equal among kings.

Why was the Lord so pleased with Solomon’s answer? Because his response was all about asking God to give him what he needed to adequately do what God had put him in the seat to do, not his own selfish personal whims.

“I will do what you have asked . . . I will give you [so that]. . . Moreover [so that.]” Solomon’s one time response to God brought about wisdom and wealth so that the world had never seen. But there was also an ongoing response to God that he had to make on a moment by moment basis.

^“14 And if you walk in my ways and obey my statutes and commands as David your father did, I will give you a long life.” ¹⁵ Then Solomon awoke,”and he realized it had been a dream. He returned to Jerusalem, stood before the ark of the Lord’s covenant and sacrificed burnt offerings and fellowship offerings. Then he gave a feast for all his court.

God also promised Solomon long life, but there is clause, this blessing would be based on “if you walk in my ways” a moment by moment decision to follow God and His ways. Which is more important? The riches the world has never seen (which has no conditions) or a long life (with a condition)? God can give either, but to God which is more important?

Years on this earth, in obedience to God, and living out His calling upon your life, is far more precious than vast wealth, education, or any other trappings of the world. Why? Because the longer you have on this earth, the longer you have to influence other people. Solomon, would influence millions.

How great is the vision that you have for your life? Ask God to show you, “Lord how can I make the most of the years that you have given me, to influence as many people as possible for You?” Don’t let the worries of this world crowd that out. Don’t let that burning movement of His Spirit in your chest become an after thought.

“He returned to Jerusalem, stood before the ark of the Lord’s covenant and sacrificed burnt offerings and fellowship offerings.” God came to Solomon in Gibeon and now Solomon moves into God’s will by going back to Jerusalem. The mercy and grace that God pours onto Solomon, moves his heart to obedience.

So if God loves to bless sinful people, and change their lives, shouldn’t we be all the more sinful? Romans 6:1-4 “What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? ²By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? ³Or don’t you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? ⁴We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.” Solomon, understanding God’s grace, doesn’t continue to sin by going to Gibeon, he changes his life and leads the people to God in Jerusalem.

In order for God to show you His great plan for your life, you have to give Him your heart. Be ready when He comes to you. He will tell you of His love for you, and how he want to bless your life, how he wants to change your life, won’t you give Him your heart? If your wish is for Jesus to take your sin away, he will do it. If your wish is for Him to use you for His glory, He will do it. But be warned, it will be big, scary and require your dependence upon Him.

Transitions

Today is the kidâ€™s last day of school, at least for this grade. As they were getting out of the car I joked with them, â€œI remember my last day of school. . . when I graduated from the fourth grade,â€ but then went on to say, â€œohh except for fifth grade, I remember the last day of fifth grade, ohh except for sixth grade, etc. . . all the way through 2009â€œ They said, we were alive in 2009!â€ â€œYeah, I was still in school when you were in second grade (the grade H-G is in now).â€ â€œBut summer vacation is almost here â€“ so enjoy it, because you will be in school until your children are in second grade!â€

Itâ€™s funny how when we end a season of our lives that we somehow think we are finished moving from one thing to another. But days of swimming, sleeping late, camps, and playing Legos all day are just around the corner. For my children, they are beginning a transition from one grade to another.Â They have made it through a new school year, a new school, new friends, a new home, and a new life.

I am reminded that FBCVâ€™s new youth pastor has completed his first week.Â It was a week of cleaning out his office, figuring out which keys go to what, meeting the staff, and trying to remember where his office is in a maze of church buildings filled with crevices and surprises.Â I am convinced that I will discover the Lost Ark somewhere on FBCV campus.

â€œI remember my first week at FBCV . . .â€ so many months ago (like ten). The end of the summer will mark my first year as serving as the Pastor of Children and Families. In many ways I still feel like I am transitioning from one life to another.

Life is constantly moving from one thing to another â€“ we are in constant transition. When you are born your body radically changes daily. From there itâ€™s walking, potty training, eating by yourself, then eventually reading, writing, driving, Calculus, girlfriends, college, marriage, kids, mini-vans, and thinning hair. At every stage, just when you have it figured out, guess what? Itâ€™s time to change to something else. If the transitions ever slow down, we get bored, and get way too contemplative. Itâ€™s the constant and sudden changes that keeps us from too deep of thought, too much time to get in trouble.

The following are a few mistakes that we can make if donâ€™t deal with transitions very well.

Mistakes of dealing with transitions of life:

1.Â Looking toward the next transition too soon. When I was in seminary there were those that would max out the amount of classes they could take. They rarely (if ever) left their rooms except to go to class. If you did happen to see these recluses, and were able to squeeze in a conversation, they constantly talked about how they wanted to finish school as soon as possible (yeah, no kidding).

They were missing â€œthe seminary experienceâ€ in order to get to the â€œreal worldâ€ of ministry. The whole purpose of seminary was to equip them for the ministry they desired to do, but in their rushing through the experience they were short circuiting the process of being equipped in order to move to the next stage.

At every stage of life and in every time of transition there are things we are to learn, life lessons to experience, and people that we are to meet and engage in life with. If you move from stage to stage, and transition to transition, with never stopping to engage in the moment, then you are going to miss something very important in your life. When have you finally arrived? At what point of â€œsuccessâ€ will you slow down and concentrate on the moment?

2.Â Not Developing Relationships As You Go. Life (and ministry) is all about relationships, people, and how we are all connected together. It took me until my adult life to realize the people who have been in my life werenâ€™t just there (as trees in a landscape)â€“ they were there for me to develop meaningful relationships with.

In our self-centered lives we tend to view people as ways to get us to where we want to go; they become tools we use to help us advance in our goals, â€œvisionsâ€, or careers. If they canâ€™t be of help to us, we tend to marginalize them out of our lives.Â This is a huge mistake. Â Even if you perceive that a person will be in your life for a short period of time, you still should make an effort to get to know them, love them, befriend them, and invest your life in theirs. Who knows where it might lead and what the future holds.

3. Â Not Enjoying the Moment. There are moments in my kidâ€™s lives that I will always treasure.Â I have loved leading Joshua and Caleb in Cub Scouts, having lunch with Isaac when I pick him up after Pre-School, or doing Hannah-Graceâ€™s hair for a dance recital when her mother had to go out of town.

It sounds clichÃ©, but â€œstop to smell the roses.â€ Our kids are only in their â€œtransitionâ€ for a moment and then they move on to something else. Each day is a gift, and each new change is an opportunity to keep a great relationship, start over, or make things right.

Transitions cause stress in our lives. We feel the need to make decisions, and our focus can become completely consumed by this need to take some action, make a final decision, or the feeling to just do something. Often times we are not sure of what we need to do, and we know this requires us to wait. In that time of stress, life still moves on, it doesnâ€™t stop because you are feeling introspective.

Ministry involves â€œemotional work.â€ Like nurses or police officers, pastors regularly engage in activities as a part of their day-to-day responsibilities where they must deal with other peopleâ€™s problems, emotions, and behavior.Â They are expected to express love, compassion, emotion, or they are expected to reserve that emotion, to be professionally distant and to control it all like a switch.

So as the years go by, if we are not careful, our emotion switch gets stuck or even broken. Numbness and callousness sets in like a whiteout in the winter. We stop feeling, caring, and everything goes on autopilot. We are so â€œprofessionalâ€ that we can fool everyone, even ourselves.

But we are numb on the inside, and we miss those moments of transitions that our kidâ€™s need for us to â€œbe there.â€ If you are at this point, and you are not able to enjoy â€œthe momentâ€ then stop what you are doing, take a break, pray, and focus on doing whatever it takes to regain your sense of feeling. One of the ways that I have found to manage that â€œprofessional numbnessâ€ is to focus on today. I donâ€™t know what God has in store for me in the future, but today I have responsibilities, children who need a dad, a wife that needs a husband, a church that is looking to me to lead in the area of â€œchildren and family.â€ If I can focus on that, and only that, then I can fend off the feeling of paralysis by analysis.

Lamentations – Part Two “Consumed By Loss of a Relationship”

We have all made mistakes and decisions that we regret. Did you know that God loves us anyway? We will discover, in the book of Lamentations, how we can stand up under the weight of our mistakes and how God can use those wrongs for our good. He still has a will and plan for your life, listen and find out.

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